Former Vlog Squad member Nik “Big Nik” Keswani is speaking out against David Dobrik.
In a recent episode of the H3 After Dark podcast with Ethan and Hila Klein, the musical artist, who originally shot to fame on Vine, shared what it was like being part of the vlogger collective.
TW: Suicidal ideation.
Ethan opened the conversation by telling Nik how his Frenemies co-host and soon-to-be sister-in-law, Trisha Paytas, felt about her time in the Vlog Squad while dating Jason Nash.
“Trisha describes being [in the Vlog Squad] as kind of toxic. Would you describe it that way?” Ethan asked. Nik responded, “It is.”
The rapper said he’s ready to tell his side of the story as there’s been a false narrative around why he is no longer part of the famous group.
“For a long time, like I felt like, worthless being in those videos because I was like, ‘Dude, why am I even like, here? Like, what’s the point of my existence?’ because I was just treated like this, uh— like this uh, punching bag,” Nik explained.
“Everyone’s just joking about me, mocking me, then the fans in public are doing the same,” Nik continued. “I had a good long look in the mirror and like, I was like, wow, I’m like really depressed.”
Previously in the episode, the 22-year-old explained that leaving the group was his own decision, and one he was grappling with for a long time. He also compared being part of the Vlog Squad to being part of a cult.
He went on to say that David frequently “trashed” him for his height and other insecurities he couldn’t control— all in the name of content. Nik was born with a condition called Dwarfism. He told Ethan and Hila this affected his self-esteem growing up.
Nik revealed he eventually asked David to stop exploiting his Dwarfism and insecurities on camera. After that, he stopped being featured in vlogs because “they no longer had someone to make fun of.”
That’s apparently when he realised that “followers, fame, money, none of this stuff is worth it if I’m getting to the point where like, I don’t even want to live”— a revelation Nik said changed the way he saw success. “I got to the point where I’m like look, I’m gaining all this stuff and I’m more depressed than I ever was before.”
When asked if he’s spoken to David since leaving the Vlog Squad, Nik said David has apologised to him and he “did seem genuinely sorry.” Nik finished by wishing David and his friends the best, and claimed he holds no ill-will towards them.